A Little Crazy

It might be an understatement to say that I am... a little crazy. Maybe a little more than a little. So, it seems appropriate to make a song (and now a blog) about the fact that I am at least a little crazy. Not bad crazy. Not, you know, like... make the "news" crazy! More like... "look at that goofy guy who can't dance" kind of crazy. Or, like... "did he really just say that" kind of crazy. Or, "OMG, dad, you are so embarrassing" kind of crazy. I think you get what I mean here.

You see, the thing is... These days I am really learning to take my "self" a whole lot less seriously. Maybe it's a midlife crisis. Or, maybe it is a post-midlife crisis. In any case, I am taking myself way less seriously this second half (or less) of life. And, if you knew me in the first half (or more) of my life thus far, you are probably thinking: "less seriously?!? Wow, that's scary!"

All of this is not to say that I am taking life less sincerely. On the contrary, I would venture to say that the less seriously I take myself, the more sincerely I experience this gift of life. This is not an attempt to escape the fact that life is filled with pain and tragedy. It is more of an attempt to dance and laugh in the face of all that seems so heavy as we acknowledge all that is beautiful. After all, what good has stress, worry, and anxiety ever done? It seems that, perhaps, these responses (stress, worry, anxiety) only perpetuate the damage of pain and tragedy.

Taking my "self" less seriously is more like an antidote to pain and tragedy. And not just "my" pain and tragedy. It is an interesting, transformational process that seems to be teaching: the less I am wrapped up in "my' pain, wounds, personal tragedy, etc., the more freedom I have to be open to the suffering of others. Open in a way that isn't as heavy as it used to be, because there is less of my "self" to get bogged down. And, when we aren't bogged down... we dance and we laugh. Dancing and laughing heal us. If you don't believe me... try it!

Rumi says, "In that moment when you are drunk on yourself... you lock yourself away in cloud after cloud of grief. And in that moment when you leap free of yourself... the moon catches you and hugs you in its arms". Jesus says, "whoever loses their life will find it". Kharaqani was asked "where do you see God?", and he said, "wherever I don't see myself."

So, may we "leap free" from the chains of "self". And, in letting go of all of the false notions of who we might think we are, may we find all of the beauty wrapped up in the uniqueness of who we truly are... who we have always been, whether we knew it or not. May we laugh in the face of all that has chained us as we dance into the reality of all that we are meant to be. And may we take it all a little less seriously and a little more sincerely.

Or, maybe I'm just a little crazy...